Marriage: The Embarrassment of the Female Leader and the Male Leader
Anthropologists have always believed that the most important task for women is to choose a spouse that can support the functioning of the family.
Laura followed this rule, and her husband of choice had a job that most women thought was a poor job-lawyer.
”Marry a lawyer,” she said, “I always thought it was a great choice because lawyers have a high income.
“Because she didn’t need to work hard to make ends meet, Laura began to try to have a light-weight casual worker, which could guarantee that she would have the whole afternoon to take care of the children.
In the initial acceleration, Laura did realize her dream.
Her husband Jonathan earns a six-figure salary every month, and she spends a little time as a relaxed pet rearing consultant.
But the good times didn’t last long. In May last year, Jonathan lost his job and he didn’t find a job again.
The burden of supporting the family suddenly fell on Laura’s shoulder.
Although their 5-year-old son Dylan often praises his father for taking care of him, it seems that Dylan is the only one who is satisfied with the change.
“This is not the life I want.
Said Laura, busy with her work.
At the same time, Jonathan was annoyed that he couldn’t cook a good meal. “I’m very frustrated.
Unemployed fathers, like many families, the Earp family is experiencing this pain and helplessness-the father is unemployed and the mother must go out to make money.
The unemployment crisis is gradually rising, and the number of unemployed men across the country has now exceeded 8,800,000.
Some of them are doing temporary jobs, including some who make money by playing online games.
However, this can only bring a small amount of income.
What’s more serious is that many frustrated employees have even given up the opportunity to continue looking for work.
It is gratifying that at least 1,700,000 unemployed men have the assistance of competent wives. These women have abandoned their “weak roles”
in history and resolutely rely on hard work to reduce the financial burden on their families.
At present, women’s education is generally higher than men’s.
In 1983, 34% of high-paid jobs were held by women; by 2001, half of the work had been done separately.
Although the average income of women is still lower than that of men, in the 2001 statistics, 30.
In 7% of families, wives have higher incomes, and they earn far more than their husbands.
In this case, the husband can only do the heavy housework.
The single-income era has a more obvious marriage pressure for some households where unemployed husbands do housework: money.
When the Internet was on the rise, Gregg Wetterman succeeded by organizing a network for the Dallas Institute of Technology.
His wife Jennie is proud to recall those days.
“In the summer of 2001, I was in the pool every day,” Jennie said.
“I go diving and dive from the air-I have to read 30 books.
“But when the technical college arose, Gregg skipped a series of unstable jobs.
When his career prospects were very bleak, an older Jennie boss asked her if she wanted to go to Old Navy for management.
Gregg said, “When she had the opportunity, I said,‘ you do n’t have to do it, ‘but I mean,‘ please, please, please . ‘”.
When Jennie worked 50 hours a week, Gregg drove their children to school to make a documentary (no one has been sold yet).
Their two cars added up to 286,000 miles; they locked their phones to save money.
At the kitchen table, the stress is obvious.
According to Gregg, unpaid work, production and technology marketing for documents related to military operations is much smarter than a job just to make up for its dissatisfaction.
“I would like to see everyone in their role,” she said.
“I don’t want to be in this state for two years.I must stop.
Greg said that might not be the case.
“It’s not obvious,” he said, “Jennie can get a better job.
“For many couples, changing roles may be a routine part of life.
Career consultants say there will be more job changes in the 21st century career, people will have more time to use training outside of work, or because of reduced size.
Many couples discuss this issue before they have children.
That’s the case with lawyer Jennifer McCaskill, 33, and accountant Ryan Schock, 28.
They are preparing for the wedding in September, and the current topic is who will take care of the children in the future.
“To be frank, I don’t want to be a homeowner.
“Jennifer McCaskil said,” I have a lot of opportunities to make money, and I don’t want to spend my time at home.
And Ryan Schock responded: “I believe he will be a good dad because he has enough patience to take care of his family, but I don’t.
“Don’t worry about what profession it is and how much money it can make. One consequence is inevitable: the party that happens at the end will eventually lead to trivial housework.
”Can he do more?
Sherie Zebrowski couldn’t accept that her husband, Sean, was unemployed, and when he went home to tell the news, she thought it was a joke.
As a software sales engineer for the Austin, Texas company, he earned $ 80,000 and commission bribes to allow Sherie to take care of their two children, exercise three sports and take weekend classes.
In the two years before he lost his job, Sean spent a long time looking for a similar job, but returned without success.
Now, the couple continues.
”I tried not to doubt him-he did a good job,”
“But after some time, you wonder: Did he find the right direction?
What else can he do?
“To pay for everything, Sherie began to change her hobby-decorative painting became a business.
Soon after, there was a job that worked 10 hours a day. When Sean was surfing the Internet, she also had most of the housework.
When the parish priests asked how they were doing, Sherie began to cry.
She told the priest: “I can understand the stress of work can ruin marriage.
“So the Zebrowskis family sat down to discuss.
“I said,‘ or go to the cashier to work or you help me, ‘”Sherie said.
Sean developed a sales plan for her oil painting business, and then began evaluating and raising prices.
They started hiring contracts.
Business is continuing, but not ideally.
“I’m still looking for work,” Sean said.
“Once I found it, Sherie could sleep well again.
This is not what I want, but I like to eat.
I will continue to sell software.
Just a matter of time.
Some of the things that Zebrowskis went through were common: among those couples, who did the housework became a battlefield.
Some men acknowledge that wives have a bionic look when their husbands are at home all day.
“I don’t notice some dirt, but she can find debris molecules,” said Brian Reid, a former reporter and now he is taking care of his daughter and his wife is a lawyer.
Sociologists believe that in fact, some men rarely do housework when they are not working.
Unemployment has threatened their masculinity, and doing some “female” work, such as playing the toilet, may only make them feel worse.
”I feel like I’m being eliminated.” Bill Laut, a former asset appraiser, is a thing of the past.
His wife, a manager of an important company, is busy working for high income.
Bill Laut did almost all the housework for this 6-year-old family of 3.
Every day he goes in and out of the grocery store, buys the things he needs at home, and silently accepts the strange eyes of passersby.
“Your wife is so abominable to let men do such things.
“They said to him.
And Bill Laut always caters to curious people by pretending to be passing by the grocery store in search of his wife.
“It was helpless. When our child was a baby, I was busy changing diapers 27 times a day.
Even so, there are still many people who think that I am unproductive and take up my wife’s light.
Sometimes I really feel like a person who has been eliminated by society.